Monday, March 24, 2008

Three weeks of missed time - five major things

Wow! A lot has happened since I put a real post on here… where to start? Ok I think there are about five major things that have happened in the last three weeks or so. I will try to post pictures of those that I have them for soon. Hope you like the huge re-cap on everything… be prepared it is a lot! Sorry!

Story #1: I got to see how folks are treated when they get to go to a psych evaluation center and a hospital. Yup that’s right! Because of some comments I posted on my blog I was required to go get a mental checkup and not allowed to come back to work until I got a release. So I got a week off before the doctor could meet with me for a follow up appointment. But at the hospital I got escorted from the emergency room section to the evaluation center by an armed guard and got to go behind oh three sets of locked doors. There I got to be patted down, had to shake out my bra and take off my shoes/socks. I also found out when I left that they had gone through everything in my bag and purse and dumped it all out and separated it all into individual baggies. After the pat down – which I assume was necessary to protect both them and myself if I was really crazy – I got put into a locked room until a nurse could come in and take a preliminary case history. Then after about 15-20 minutes I got to go to another locked room to talk with the psychiatrist. This was the really make me feel crazy part because the session was held via teleconference. Yup if you don’t feel crazy talking to a person on the tv and having them talk back kinda makes you question your sanity. I also found out that I remember a lot more of my abonormal psych class then I thought I did. Some of his questions I so badly wanted to say… no I don’t have PTS Syndrome, no I don’t have Bi-polar Disorder. After I would answer his questions he would say ok well there we were looking for this disorder and you know each time I actually knew what he was looking for! Go me! He concluded that while I was depressed I was not really suicidal so I got to go home after about four hours. So that is good right? The only bad thing that came out of this whole situation is now some of the gals at work --- well to be quite honest are acting like I am a leper or something. Ah anytime I try to make conversation they end it quickly and pretty much have stopped talking to me. I am not sure if it is because they think I am mad at them for sending me away (which I am not) or if they have just never really been comfortable around me and so this was a perfect way for them to start distancing themselves from me. Oh well… while it make work interesting when people whisper and/or ignore you I guess it is just the way it is. I am ok with this whole situation and they will just have to get used to it I guess.

Story #2: I left Tyler!!!!!! And I can’t tell you how happy I am… seriously I have been having an episode of major depression for the last well honestly year (and no I did not get help until recently – my bad I know) because of how upset and unhappy I was in my marriage. And since I have told him I just feel this huge weight lifted off of my chest. Most everything got moved out of the house a week ago. Tyler has stopped calling over 10 times a day to question why. He does not understand why I left… even when I told him all the reasons why, they are not good enough. Somehow he thinks three days (he took off when story #1 happened) of him doing everything I want would fix over three years of him basically making me feel like shit. I have refrained from telling him “Have you ever heard the expression too little too late?” Anyways I moved in with Dad. Which in all honestly is a little odd; I have not lived with him in about 11 years. I got my first piece of mail there on Friday and it was like “Oh crap… I really live here now!” The dogs and I have taken over the back half of the house but at least I am trying to keep things neat back there… lol don’t feel bad because my little brother and step-brother have taken over the front half of the house and it is well much like you would expect from a 21 & 20 (respectively) year old guys. The girls are doing well there. Salsa barks when the guys come home at two-three in the morning… and for some reason she really does not like my step-brother and barks at him when he walks around the house. But they are getting to spend lots of time outside (Tyler had five-minute limits) and are loving every minute of it! He has a chain link fence and so they can be peeping toms without having to choose if they want to smell the interesting things through a knothole or see them.

Story #3: I got some tattoos! You know have been a chicken-shit and never been brave enough to get them. I was afraid it would hurt really bad and I would have like a permanent freckle because I would just let them do a little bit and be like nope… no more! Plus I got them on the inside of my wrist. Everyone I talked to that had tattoos said that was the worst spot to get them because it hurts really bad due to the fact there is not a lot of skin/muscle/fat there to cushion the needle. I am really proud… first off with both wrist I only winced a total of one time. Tim said something like she is tryin to be hard but honestly it did not hurt as bad as I had anticipated! This could be a bad thing because now I really want to get more done! Thinking I could get some along my sides… but I will have to think some more on it. I need to find my little photo card uploader thing so I can show everyone pictures of them.

Story #4: I went to a SWARM in Tulsa, OK. Ok for those of you who think I am crazy because I used the word swarm and have no clue what it means here is your answer: I own a personal diecut machine called the Cricut. There is a message board community that is a playground for thousands of Cricut owners and sometimes we get together at events called swarms (a group of crickets are called swarms – get it) to scrapbook, chat and play for a couple of days. Well I go invited to drive down to Tulsa, OK and join the lovely ladies of that area for a crop. I have to tell you these ladies are some of the most fun and sweetest people you will ever meet! I have only met a handful of them in person about a year ago and still I got hugs and big hellos from quite a few. It was so much fun and I can’t wait until the next one in May! I kinda knew it would be the last time I would really get to crop for a while since all of my stuff was getting boxed up and put into storage so it forced me to focus (a little at least) and work on stuff. I got 58 cards done (omg I have never been so productive at a crop) a couple of altered items – notebooks & card boxes and a few make-n-takes – bookmarks, card, and a really cute favor box which I used the design for Easter gifts. Only one 18-gallon tote of supplies went with me – oh and a carry bag but I had enough things for everyone to laugh about me moving into the school cafeteria. I looked like I had a little fort with all of my items on my table. (Is it sad that I have at least 10 more totes full of scrapbooking stuff?) Oh wait --- look I got bright green glasses too! If you look to the left of me on the window ledge you can see my growing stack of cards!

Story #5: My friend of oh geese 14(?) years moved in with my best friend. I suggested it when she needed a place to live but honestly it is a little odd. Lol, I don’t know when I go over there who I am supposed to be hanging out with! Plus she is a baker – so sad that my guys won’t need my baking anymore! Now I have no one to eat my cookies! Plus it is odd for me because well ok honestly my best friend has been kinda distant from me because of my whole divorce thing – he just does not know how to handle it – and now he is kinda doing all the things with her he used to do with me. Is it sad that the one time she spent the night in the garage while he worked on his car I got jealous? (Ok I know that is sad) And like last night they were talking a lot and she kept coming downstairs to chat… I dunno it is odd for me. I am happy she moved in there because the guys are great and honestly it is a safe place to be with people to help her take her mind off things. But still they now have these little inside jokes and little games they play (like stealing the cookie dough – sounds so stupid when I write it down) and I just am kinda sad. I am hoping though once I get my life straightened out things will get better between me and the best friend.

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